“Someday, we’ll run into each other again, I know it. Maybe I’ll be older and smarter and just plain better. If that happens, that’s when you’ll deserve me . But now, at this moment, you can’t hook your boat to mine, because you’re liable to sink us both.”
There’s this blue feeling about me today. I don’t feel like smiling, the weather outside is stormy and grey… sometimes it feels like the weather changes as my mind does. I think there’s a word for that. None of me really wants to be writing right now or really doing anything. I don’t mind these days of sadness though. Crying is a release, the tears flow and memories are let go. Sometimes it is necessary. It’s all been blue skies and sunshine the past few weeks. How would you know happiness without sadness?
My mind feels confused and I don’t know what my next steps should be… it’s easy to just run away, but what’s right?
I picked some mushrooms in the hills yesterday maybe if I took them things would feel a bit lighter, or maybe I need to go through this as is.
There’s a feeling like spirits are watching me but at least I’m not alone.
I just want to disappear for a while, retreat into nothingness where no one can find me. But at the same time don’t want to be alone, I want to be protected and cherished.
Still its true, this too shall pass. It always does, the ebb and flow of life is a fickle thing. At least it keeps us on our toes.
Dancing is a good release, I danced last night for the first time in a while. There was a reggae all dayer in town. I ran into lots of familiar faces there, some that I’d prefer not to have, but these things happen.
What I’m gonna share today is barely even a poem but stream of thought, it is how it is.
I’ve been running around,
and running away,
lost and blind.
I feel embarrassed and ashamed of myself
even though I have no cause to be.
Nobody has their shit together.
creativeflow 